Author Topic: about that site


about that site
« on: September 14, 2011 »

Much as I enjoy little projects like this magazine cover,* I sometimes wonder why I do it, or at least why I do it here. Why not go somewhere with fewer tumbleweeds to service my addiction?

I've been building follies here long enough to make it my default setting. WordPress hasn't been a completely satisfying alternative. As for playing where there's more traffic, I don't quite fit in anywhere. As usual.

My latest folly is a whole other forum.

with apologies to Dr Seuss

Today is your day.
You've found a new forum!
You're welcome to stay!

If you've brains in your head
And a bike in your shed
And a soul and a heart
It's a very good start!

You can register now,
It's as easy as pie.
Just fill out the form,
You don't have to like pie.

Once you're in then look out!
It's almost time for my cue -
Concerning this software:
Oh, the things you can do!

Let's start with a post,
No, we'll start with a toast!
From all us freeloaders to SMF coders,
We raise our glass higher than most!

Now it's your turn,
Go ahead, don't be shy,
You've something to say,
The limit's the sky!

OK here we go,
First find a good board,
We don't have too many
To tax the old gourd!

The next part comes naturally
Click 'Start a New Topic',
A screen will appear
With a field full of clear!

The cursor will blink!
Demanding you think!
First, "What shall I call it?"
"How long can I stall it?"
"Can I please phone a friend?"
"Or an email send?"
"Will the session time out?"
"Or start over again?"
I'm happy to report you can later rename!
Don't sweat the small stuff
If the first title's lame!

Back to your message,
That box that needs filling,
It's like that old saying,
Your thoughts for a shilling.

Whatever you write,
Be it heavy or light,
Every time you post,
Think of the forum you'd like!

(That's all I will preach
Might as well eat a peach
With Chong and then Cheech,
Now I'm starting to reach...)

After you've posted
You can edit, delete
My help isn't needed!
Nor cases be pleaded!

The forum's your oyster
With many permissions
Speaking of peaches
How about a persimmon?

Now I am hungry
Spam will be eaten
Or frisked and then beaten
A judge but no jury.

We've no sweary fairy
When language gets hairy
Just cover your eyes
Or try a patch on for size!

I'll leave you with this
It's not deep or profound:
If you've fingers, then type
If you've voice, make a sound!

Despite previous work on elaborate structures, I'm a minimalist. Perhaps that's the way I've grown... or shrunk. That's Simple Machines 2.0 out of the box, with modifications by actual programmers rather than me guessing at code, and an agreeable enough theme. There are things I would change, but I'm not keen to hire someone to change them this time.

All that's missing is, you know, people.

Can't effectively advertise, and word of mouth works both ways. I could populate it with make believe users or historical figures to help get things rolling — Mark Twain discussing critical mass with Thomas Malthus might at least attract rubberneckers — but such amusements pall after a time.

No, I don't imagine this will fly. It's merely a fun exercise in how I would make another cycling forum. The last one.

* Thank you Thomas Knowll, Seetharaman Narayanan, Andrew Coven, Julie Kmoch, Scott Byer, Russell Williams, Marc Pawliger, David Howe, Sau Tam, Julie Meridian, Joe Ault, Vinod Balakrishnan, Jeff Chien, Jon Clauson, Chris Cox, Alan Erickson, Paul Ferguson, Todor Georgiev, Jerry Harris, Edward Kandrot, Sarah Kong, Tai Luxon, John Penn II, John Peterson, Tom Pinkerton, Tom Ruark, Cris Rys, Geoff Scott, John Worthington, Tim Wright, Rick Wulff, Jackie Lincoln-Owyang, Yukie Takahashi, Kelly Davis, Sandra Alves, Karen Gauthier, John Nack, Yoko Nakagawa, Gwyn Weisberg, Maria Yap, and Kevin Connor, for Photoshop. Though actually, I used Fireworks (and later, Sketch) to put these things together.

This site was so old, the software creaky with numberless mods, I was going to set it in aspic and move on, fingers crossed it wouldn't crash from neglect. Alas, a few years later I threw a little money at the problem and made it stable again. I say Alas because now I was left with two perfectly serviceable forums when one was more than enough. In the true spirit of folly I shrunk ACF mark II to a single board – it didn't start out that minimalist – and rechristened it NACF, <time travel mode> the current incarnation of which won't launch until next year.