Last night, just as I was settling down to sleep at around 2 in the morning, a cow started bellowing into my ear. He was actually outside (our house isn't quite so open plan), but might as well have been in the same room.
Normally it's just sheep around us, but the farmer has mixed in some not-sheep, much to our consternation. First he strung a flimsy electric temporary fence around our property, because our wood fence is falling down. This hasn't been enough to keep them out. Last time they just trampled it under hoof.
Yesterday a young 'un managed to get on our side of the wire without disturbing it. After it got dark his mates took up residence not far away, and all was quiet. Then they left, leaving this poor cow
on his own. I figured he'd be venting his frustration all night if I didn't do something - but what?
I had some heavy fence posts in the garage, salvaged from an earlier destruction, so I tossed them one by one onto the wire, attempting to provide an escape route. They bounced off, one by one.
Not wanting to meet the cow without a weapon, I got out a rake, intending to set the posts on the wire after disconnecting it from its plastic post. First I lifted it from my side of the gate and attempted to coax him underneath using English, which he didn't speak. My only reward was a mild shock, as I'd donned but a single rubber glove, only having one spare.
It was time to enter the field of potential combat. Laugh if you must, but these edible beasts are legit dangerous. Rake at the ready, I set the posts carefully on the wire, then hurriedly left. Fortunately the cow figured things out, permitting me to retrieve the posts and go back to bed as he left in search of better company, roaring plaintively into the mist.