Author Topic: Here there be sea serpents


Here there be sea serpents
« on: July 15, 2019 »
Today's mission: the Petrie Museum of Egyptian Archaeology, and the Grant Museum of Zoology, both part of University College London.

You are where?

A fire extinguisher is probably better protection than a sphynx

OMG, I forgot to go to Tripadvisor first. This must be how Victorian explorers felt.

Speaking of Victorian.
Seriously, I'm fine with old fashioned, pile 'em high displays of artefacts. Still mourn the pre-revamped Room 33 at the British Museum.

If Richard Francis Burton had had one of these, his researches into erotica would’ve gone much faster

Somebody throw a doily over them, quick. (I didn't go looking for this, I just followed the groove in the floor.)

"This is going in my Tripadvisor review."

Instructions for making a Nile cruiser

Lid doesn’t fit the jar? That’s some sloppy work, people.

When a good fashion idea came along, both hatmakers and architects scrambled for it

Has puzzled caption writers for millennia

You look green, this should settle your stomach

Captured for all eternity: that first date

Going to grandma's meant dusting her shabti collection

and she always knew when you broke something

Hearing aide

You have to be in it to win it

If only I’d married my brother, rather than the boy next door, I could’ve ended up in a pyramid instead

Is there anything else I can get you before I return to my fantasy slave girl duties?

Before cat videos

The gift that says you cared enough to plunder a grave


Scenes at the museum
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2019 »

Have you seen my dog?

The last thing the caveman saw before his caveneighbour said "He just wants to play."

Drifters always have shifty eyes, but first they had to evolve them

If you don't mind getting wet, there's a jellyfish I'd like to introduce you to

Never go rummaging in the back of grandma's preserves cupboard

You can tell you're adopted because you're always the first to end up in a jar of formaldehyde

Young Steven’s request for a raise in his allowance was “to improve production values”

Their eyes met across a crowded ribcage

Why it's not always a good idea to have a look outside the pouch

You'd look scary to him too if you were standing on your head

When the recipe calls for these, you know you’re in for an enchanting meal

Finger lickin’ grub

The next time the kids want to go to the zoo, tell ‘em to look at their thumbs

Elevator going down?

Here there be sea serpents

Sure, I'll take your survey

#10 - It made me feel alive

If you’re not distracted by sea serpents smaller than your thumb, they’re doing something wrong

Not always very good ones

They forgot to ask if the museum blew my mind


Scenes at the museum
« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2019 »
Bonus round: the nearby Wellcome Collection, "for the incurably curious"

There was renewed interest when it was discovered her last will and testament included a treasure map

Doctors learn if you've got a piece left over, you've done something wrong

How great thou art: hymn, or pillow talk?

A cigar may just be a cigar, but kiwi is presumed kinky until proven otherwise

Somebody was master of your domain, but it sure as hell wasn’t you

Like bear traps for the little bear. Or whatever you’re calling it.

The Christmas present that says "Open mine first"
Alternate caption: Some things are exactly what they look like under the wrapping

How obstetricians get in the mood

The seance was going remarkably well

Smoke and Mirrors: The Psychology of Magic

Suddenly realising the key he'd regurgitated opened his date's chastity belt for after the show

A second line of defense in case the bear traps don't work

If you feel a hand in your pocket, it's probably not the devil's

Proof that even the spirit world is not immune to selfies

I could show you how that trick works but then I'd have to saw you in half

You cannot be serious

Card shark by night, card peacock by day