Author Topic: The Slaughtered Lamb

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #500 on: November 13, 2023 »

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #501 on: November 19, 2023 »
Registration agreement, first draft:
Quote
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #502 on: November 23, 2023 »
Last Christmas my husband bought me an 'experience' gift. It was a coupon for an orgasm. He then explained what an orgasm was, including a re-enactment from something called 'When Harry Met Sally'. I had to remind him that I had once taught sex education, though it's true I'd always brought in a nun to cover the module on female satisfaction.

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #503 on: November 24, 2023 »

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #504 on: November 25, 2023 »
How many exploding cigars did you avoid?

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #505 on: November 28, 2023 »
I once made an exploding cigar for Einstein, but he smoked pipes. He regifted it to Feyman, who sensed a practical joke in the works but was a good sport and lit up anyway. Pauli snatched it from his mouth and threw it out the window, where Oppenheimer was chatting with General Groves. It landed on Groves's hat. The quick-thinking Oppie grabbed the hat off his head – a severe breach of protocol regardless of the situation – and was just about to stomp on when it POPPED, ruining the hat. They docked my pay for that, which caused a bitter row with Laura on the home front, let me tell you.

Those were crazy times.

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #506 on: December 01, 2023 »
I hate to be that guy, but Pauli wasn't there.

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #507 on: December 02, 2023 »
That's fucked up.

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #508 on: December 03, 2023 »
I'm here to reclaim this pub for the living! So to speak. I'll have my free birthday drink, barkeep.

[Hill is thrown out, an event which shall be commemorated by National Trust arch-nemesis English Heritage in due course with a Blue Plaque.]

The Slaughtered Lamb
« Reply #509 on: December 08, 2023 »
[Plants a tree for her]