Author Topic: Escape


  • special ghost appearance
« on: December 05, 2020 »
Dear All,

It’s a month since I was dropped off for a repair to reacquaint my chainstay with its dropout.

Postcard from another thread

Sorry not to have called or written with an update on my place in the queue. I’ve been kept in the dark myself. Kind of like you guys in the shed (joke).

Santa has nothing on this workshop. It's full of flashy fellows, some of whom look down their stems at me. I'm regarded as a bit simple, a rube wrapped inside an Enigma. Not having decals is like showing up at a nice restaurant without a tie.

The toe clips certainly don't help. A passing critic asked if they're a fetish. He appeared to be salivating slightly.

You've never seen so many disc brakes! "How on earth do you stop? a high end Excel asked the other day, aghast at my calipers. "A responsive, predictable, and wonderfully compliant bike wouldn't be caught dead wearing those." Someone needs to learn manners.

I understand Langster has been getting out the most in my absence, which I trust isn't making the heart grow fickle. Good for you, L. Seriously, you're welcome to the winter roads.

See you soon, spokes crossed.

PS. The company will neither confirm nor deny the following concepts for new models:


Estranged ("marketed to cycling widows")



  • special ghost appearance
« Reply #1 on: December 18, 2020 »
A wistful look upon handover by Mr Enigma himself at my classic round tubes, a swipe with disinfectant as a nod to the times in which we live, a giddy spin around the industrial estate to ensure all was in order – now I'm home again and ready to ride!

Can’t say I’m happy with my new name. Meant as a joke, it has stuck, though I’m assured I’m still loved

and am unlikely to be called it within range of anyone’s hearing.

Until recently none of us ever rated a name. That changed with Lucy the Litespeed, so-called thanks to one too many unfulfilled hopes.

Foiled again

I am emphatically not a lemon. FAMOUS LAST WORDS. Yet it cannot be denied I have not been blessed with the infallibility that titanium promises. Hey, nobody's perfect.

Close enough

PS. The next day, after careful observation of the clouds and wind direction, off we went. Perhaps 5 minutes from the end of a 90 minute ride we got drenched.