With your combination of real world and theoretical cellblock experience, and my Open University course at Emerald City and other American hellholes
World's highest prison population = ideal demographic
If you can't hold a tune you don't last long in the jointalong with a brief but formative ‘scared straight’ exposure thanks to a neighbour who was the county sheriff (lesson learnt: he who confiscates fireworks gets to set off fireworks), incarceration is beginning to sound like a viable career move. We should be able to rule whatever secure government facility in which we find ourselves. You’ll be known as “the dentist”, with slightly aggrandised backstory to send chills down the spine of even the most hardened con
and I’ll be
the man who can get things, such as forks forbidden by The Man to keep the men from
dreaming
and Netflix,
when they’ve had it turned off as punishment for the latest shanking.
In hindsight that cutlery factory wasn't the best ideaI like life in outside lockdown as much as I’m sure you do, so we shouldn’t have to spend actual
years inside: just long enough to pad our respective CVs and sell our story to the highest bidder, taking care to secure film rights.
"We heard you're in for stealing bikes."
