Author Topic: Quoth unquoth


Quoth unquoth
« on: November 12, 2022 »

Winter is icumen in,

Cyclists sing Goddamn,

Raineth drop and staineth slop,

And how the wind doth ramm!

Sing: Goddamm.

Ezra Euro

We all of us live too much in a roundabout.

Benjamin Derailleur

In the new code of laws which I suppose it will
 be necessary for you to make I desire you would 
remember the cyclists, and be more generous and 
favourable to them than your ancestors. Do not
 put such unlimited power into the hands of the
 motorists. Remember all motorists would 
be tyrants if they could.

Abseil Adams

We shall not flag or fail. We shall cycle in the cities, we shall cycle alongside the seas and rivers, we shall cycle with growing confidence and growing strength in the saddle, we shall defend our few feet of space, whatever the cost may be, we shall cycle on the A-roads, we shall cycle on the B-roads, we shall cycle in the lanes and in the streets, we shall cycle up the hills; we shall never surrender our handlebars.

Sir Winston Chainwheel

'Twas brilliant, but the slippery slopes

Did gyre my gimble and my wabe;

All mimsy were my knees, you know,

And the mome raths outgrabe my jersey.

Beware the Lorrytruck, my son!

The tyres that crush, the grills that mash!

Beware the angry Pedestrian, and shun

The frumious Taxicab!

Lewie Lewie Carroll

They can have my bike when
 they pry my cold, dead fingers from it.

American saying, sometimes attributed to Joe Breezey

I cycle, therefore I am.
Dizzy Descartes

No man lives without jostling and being jostled; in all ways
 he has to elbow himself through the world, giving and receiving
 offense. And that's just the couriers.

Thomas Carmile

Last night I dreamt I was riding a unicycle again.

Daphne Du Moulton

The lanes are lovely, quiet and steep.

But I have my 'personal best' time to beat,

And miles to go before I sleep,

Shower, dinner, then some sleep.

Robert 'Don't Fence Me In' Frosting

God, give me grace to accept with serenity the motorist who
 cuts me up, the courage to cycle alongside him, and the 
wisdom to refrain from attacking him like a rabid dog.

Rudy Niebuhr

Bicycle is a bicycle is a bicycle is a bicycle.
 You can even quote me on that.

Girdle Stein

You turn if you want to. The lady's not for turning.

Margaret Hatchet, overheard talking to Denis
 whilst captaining a tandem

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself, and White Van Man.

Franklin Hooverbelt

When you have eliminated the impossible,
 whatever remains, however improbable,
 must be integrated transport policy.

Sureluck Holmes

We are not amused. Then again, we are so seldom amused.

Queen Victrola, being entertained by a troupe of stunt cyclists

I will make you shorter by the headset.

Elizabeth 1.0

Freewheeling at last,
 Freewheeling at last,
 Thank God Almighty,
 I'm freewheeling at last.

Anonymous spiritual

I have a dream that one day on the gray pavement
 the sons of cyclists and the sons of pedestrians 
will be able to coexist in brotherhood.

Martin Luther Kingcycle

What is the sound of one hand signaling?

Zen riddle

A journey of 1000 miles must begin with a single crank-turn.


Know then thy route, presume not signs to scan;

The proper study of mankind is maps.

Al Pope

For we that live to cycle must cycle to live.

Sam 'The Man' Johnson

Nice guy, great talker, but I wouldn't want to be his stoker.

James Boozewell

The mass of commuters lead lives of quiet desperation.

Hank Thoreau

Beware of all enterprises that require a change into Lycra.


It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single
 man in possession of a bicycle, must be in want of another one.

Jane Austin-Healy

I only regret that I had but one bicycle.

Nathan Not-so-Hale

Cyclists? Bastards. I hunt them.

Prince Phillips-Head

Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you.

Satchel Road-Rage

Down a quaint and curious street
 and right into a car door––
While I nodded, nearly napping,
 suddenly there came a tapping,

As if asphalt gently rapping, rapping on my helmet, or––

Ah, distinctly I remember
 it was in the bleak December;

And my dynamo whined
 and wrought its light upon the road.

Sorrow o'r that damned car door.

Quoth the cyclist: "God, I'm sore."

Edgar Allen Poor

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are avoiding the cars.

Oscar Mild

Is that a spanner in your packet, or are you just happy to see me?

Mae Jest

Sometimes a pump is just a pump.

Sigmund Fraud

'Tis better to have cycled and fallen

Than never to have cycled at all.

Alfred, Lord Comma

To stop or not to stop, that is the question; 
the light is red, but my heart is green.

Christopher Marlowe

If I have cycled further it is by sitting upon the saddle of a fast tourer.

Sir Isaac Nuisance

Hell is other people. In cars.

Jean Paul Smartarse

Hell is Jean Paul. On or off a bike
Simone de Boutonniere, author of 'Bicycles are not Second-Best'

Two wheels good, four wheels bad. 

A pig contemplating a bike

Cars are different from bikes. They have more wheels.

Ernest Motorway

Men seldom make passes

At speedier lasses.

Dorothy Parkithere

How many flat tyres must one man patch,

Before you can call him a man?

Ralph Dylan

They paved paradise
 and put up a parking lot.

Moani Mitchell

Hitch your bicycle to a star. 
Or a roof rack on a car.

Where's Waldo Emerson

Life is not so short but that there is always time enough for one more ride.

And so to bike.

Samuel Peeps