A Special Note

A Special Note

In keeping with the spirit of this story (remember Abbie Hoffman's 'Steal This Book'?), we've nicked it. In other words, we failed to obtain permission from the Onion. We've used it anyway because:

It's very funny.
The Onion is such a popular site that they don't answer their mail with anything which rises above an autoresponse.
The autoresponse in question consisted of boilerplate which provided a convenient loophole, to wit: "We do pursue legal recourse if our material is used within COMMERCIAL on- or off-line publications without our written permission."
It seemed particularly poignant, considering our own experience with bike theft (see the vanishing).
The headline 'No One Seems To Care That Story Was Stolen' optimistically suggested itself, and
We honestly didn't think the Onion would mind, as BR is providing full credit and isn't profiting in any way.

Now on to the story.