With her mother as role model, Nancy's dream was to bear fruit from her own loins one day.
Becoming a Hollywood starlet was only ever a fallback position.
Ronald Reagan, famously a former lifeguard, was immediately smitten by this centerfold in
Pool Liner Monthly, which he "read for the articles".
After Nancy's frank appraisal of Ronald in his swim trunks, the two quickly became an item.
Like about 10% of the population, Ronald was left-handed. Nancy was right-handed.
I will not repeat salacious rumours of her talents at third base. Suffice it to say if she was to realise her procreative ambitions, a home run would be necessary.
The groom looks so happy here. He'd never see third base again.
First came love, then came marriage, then came anticlimax by the name of Patti. Nancy soon realised the wisdom behind "Be careful what you wish for." There was more to life than motherhood after all.
Ronald was pleased as punch to next be in receipt of a boy. His wife, however, needed all her skills as an actress to summon a smile, and still fell short. (Her diary entry for that day reads "If Ronnie asks for another, just say no.") Her daughter was still too young to disguise her outright loathing.
Fortunately for all concerned, Nancy accepted her fate. It wasn't a bad life. Being rich helped.
One day while watching Ronald pledge allegiance to the flag he kept on his side of the bed, Nancy realised her husband was destined for greatness. With help from the same astrologer who had predicted Bonzo's career trajectory, she charted a course which was to lead to the White House.
Sharing a private joke on the campaign trail about how Reaganomics will eventually hollow out the middle class.
The Gaze. The new first lady is also wondering if her commander in chief has packed his trunks.
She truly had the common touch, provided everybody had been disinfected first.
Trademocked.
Pope John Paul II recounts how just saying no to premarital sex is working for the
Catholic Church.
Chief of Staff Donald Regan was a Sagittarius, which proved not to be auspicious.
Nancy survived her own assassination attempt when a
James Stewart fan, whose paw was later found to have been registered as a lethal weapon, slipped onto the balcony. The Secret Service put him down with extreme prejudice.
President and prime minister dogging on the White House lawn.
Margaret Thatcher was never a serious threat to her husband's affections, but Nancy instructed the Secret Service to put her down too, just in case. The request was quietly filed and not another word said about it.
Ronnie called Nancy
'Mommie'. This could be a mood killer.
Mommie is busy.
Official photographs with the Bushes were cropped to her specifications.
"Rhymes with bitch," she is reported to have said about her successor as FLOTUS.
Long estranged, mother and daughter would reconnect through a shared love of clubbing. Patti chatted about her campaign to promote breast exams, but left out a few details.
Just say yes to a 'manogram'
Ron Jr. was forever scarred by the looks his sister gave him as a baby.
